The Holy Family as a role Model for our Families
Nowadays, the Solemnity of the Holy Family and the model it shows us are very necessary. And not only as a positive example to follow, but also as a sign of opposition to the sick conceptions of marriage, family, education and the whole of social life.
It is a pattern, an ideal. This pattern is close and human, even familiar. In the house of Nazareth, each of us would probably feel at home, without the intimidating artificiality or sense of strangeness. Therefore, it is worth looking at this pattern to shape the life of one's own family according to it.
What is a family?
Family is mom, dad and children. It is so simple and obvious, and some can even complicate this obviousness. If the family were only a human invention, a social creation shaped in a long process of negotiations, polls, consensus-building, social consultations, etc., then it could possibly be questioned, modified or experimented with various new concepts. But the family model is organically inscribed in the very essence and foundation of humanity. Just as it is impossible to change the laws of physics or chemistry, so it is impossible to change the mechanisms of fertility and family life. They can only be cared for and cared for by legally guaranteeing special protection and privileges to the family, and by establishing moral norms which, from within, through conscience, will shape human attitudes towards marriage and the family.
In fact, for millennia this was obvious to everyone, at least in the main frameworks, determined by the natural mechanism of procreation, which functions universally throughout the natural world. This mechanism is strictly defined and determined by the biological and social nature of man. Therefore, the family model compatible with this mechanism is very simple, clear and precise, leaving no room for discussion. Yes, in the history of the family there was a certain evolution, humanity learned from mistakes, undertook various searches and attempts, but all of them always concerned a couple – a man and a woman, because this was required fertility, universally recognized as an unquestionable value. Based on this primordial experience, people in diverse cultures tested different socio-family models: polygamy, harem, patriarchy, slavery. But everything gradually evolved towards a monogamous, indissoluble marriage between a man and a woman.
Marriage in God's Plan
This model is also recorded in Genesis as a fundamental revealed truth. Marriage is planned and created by God and is integral to the very nature of creation and humanity. God created man male and female and endowed them with fertility, the ability to transmit life. This duality of sexes, unequivocally defined in the biological and genetic construction of the human person, is the basis for the complementarity of man and woman, boy and girl, husband and wife, father and mother. It is also the foundation of a social life that is harmonious and adapted to the possibilities of taking on the various roles necessary in society.
The nature of man as a sexually diverse being called to fruitful marriage is defined and described right at the very beginning of the Book of Genesis. " God created mankind in his image; in the image of God, he created them; male and female he created them.” Gen 1:27) God did not want man to be alone, so he created him to live in the fundamental community of marriage and the family built on it. That is why, immediately afterwards, we hear the first commandment recorded in the Bible: " Be fertile and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it" (Gen 1:28) To help man accomplish this difficult mission, God dictated to man a golden moral and pedagogical rule for marriage: " That is why a man leaves his father and mother and clings to his wife, and the two of them become one body." (Gen 2:24) The importance of this truth is shown by the fact that it was later repeatedly referred to and quoted by Jesus in the New Testament. These three primordial principles, revealed and written at the very beginning of the Bible, form the constitutive founding act of marriage and the family, they define God's plan for man and humanity.
Following the example of the Holy Family
But God did not limit Himself to theoretical concepts and moral norms. He showed a practical model of marriage and family that you can see and implement in your life. This model was personally confirmed and sanctified by God with his presence and direct commitment. Jesus, the Son of God, conceived by the Holy Spirit, came into the world in a human family to show that nothing better or needed is necessary, that in this way the optimum was achieved: the Holy Family of Nazareth, that is, Joseph, Mary and Jesus. Through the marriage of Joseph and Mary, in which the Son of God was born and brought up, we have received a model and an absolute point of reference for every human family. In the Holy Family of Nazareth, God put his seal, confirmed his intention and gave man a model example of how every healthy family should look and function.
Nothing better can be done than to adopt this model and shape personal, family and social life according to it. This is how it worked for centuries, from generation to generation. So far, no one has questioned the institution of the family and the principles that define it. On the contrary: parents, grandparents, school, local communities, art, literature – everything was the guardian of this sacred model of family life. In countless houses hung on the wall a painting depicting the Holy Family with Joseph at the carpentry workshop, Mary at the spinning wheel with yarn and Jesus playing. Today, such an image may seem naïve, but the content contained in it has shaped our mentality for centuries and was the foundation of upbringing.
Would someone who has experienced family warmth and love in his own home, from mom and dad, who has grown up in security and self-worth, who has formed his gender, personal and social identity in such a favorable environment, now tear it all down and discard it? And yet, in contemporary culture, we must deal with such an absurd phenomenon of rebellion against one's own nature. How did it happen that for several decades a highly developed Western civilization, shaping norms and setting the direction for the entire world, that this civilization entered the path of suicidal destruction? It is difficult to answer this question, just as it is difficult to fathom the mystery of evil, misterium iniquitatis.
But just as in the case of sin God sent his Son to man to redeem him and to show him the way of truth, so now God shows to lost human families and societies some concrete, living model, precisely in the family of Jesus, Mary and Joseph. This is the ideal and the point of reference, the evidence that reveals the truth about man, marriage and the family. From this it is necessary to begin a realistic, rational and practical anthropological reflection.
God or the world
This reflection is very necessary today. The powerful forces and primal instincts that make up the mechanism of procreation can easily get out of control and turn into destructive elements of desire, licentiousness, selfishness, violence, discrimination. Humanity has had to struggle with this for centuries and this struggle continues to this day. But today, temptations, difficulties, confusing movies, commercials, false patterns and manipulation of human consciousness have reached their peaks. Too many distorted and insidious ideas have created, with unlimited resources, finances, media propaganda, international organizations and authorities at their service. Many people, especially young people, cannot resist this pressure.
And on the other side, against this world power of propaganda and manipulation, stands a modest, inconspicuous, poor family from Nazareth. God's family. It’s example and influence are powerful. However, we must open ourselves to it, use tools that will help in forming our families on the model of the Holy Family of Nazareth. The first is living faith, that is, relationship, a direct bond and encounter with Jesus and, with him, also with Mary andJoseph. It must be learned from an early age. It is the parents who are to be for their children the image of the Holy Family, a living illustration that will show what love, trust, peace and forgiveness are. When a young person does not experience this on the part of his loved ones, he will not be able to understand what God's love, God's forgiveness, peace of heart, trusting obedience are.
The next tool must be the Bible. This Scripture is a manual of faith, life of faith, married life, education. In the New Testament there are only a dozen sentences from the Gospel and the Epistles of St. Paul. Truly little. But it was on these sentences that the great school of Christian family life was built.
And finally, the testimonies and example of the lives of countless witnesses of Jesus. Both the "certified" and official, that is, canonized saints, as well as the anonymous ones: our parents, grandparents, neighbors. It is they who, by their example of care, love, gentleness, kindness, teach us how family life should look like. This example should be more vivid and convincing than various patterns from television. It is in their home, from mom and dad, not from the TV screen, that a child or teenager should experience love, have conversations, ask questions and receive answers, see role models. Many young people do not have such experience and they are the most susceptible to various falsehoods and distortions of anti-family propaganda.
In this situation, we must make a choice and bear courageous witness to it: Jesus or the world; The Holy Family or gender and cohabitation; family home or the world of TV series. One cannot shrug one's shoulders indifferently in the belief that the matter is obvious, that the family will defend itself. Yes, but not without our participation. Today, not everyone sees this obviousness, and some have never personally experienced family love, because from the beginning they lived in a pathological family. Therefore, we need witnesses who will show by a personal example of life how a loving family should look and live.
Until Tomorrow
fr. george